Degradation
by wit4hire
Summary: In a world where being human is synonymous with being food to vampires, Bella is used as a tool by Edward in a ploy to break Rosalie's fast. This is a dark tale and not suitable for everyone.


**A warning for readers: This story is an allegory for rape and should be read with that in mind. If you are looking for romance, you will not find it here.**

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><p>It is hard to say which I feel less – things that are emotional, like the dull recognition of how tediously annoying my brother's lackeys are, or things that are physical, like the crunch of bone under finger as I casually squeezed the neck of one. After living in a world overrun by the terrors that Edward has sired, I have lost the connection I had to uplifting emotion, but also shut away my rage, finding it hindering me more so than helping. I have been living in this world for over two thousand years and the insignificance of even the creature struggling against my hand is a statement towards how little I feel physically.<p>

"Now, now, sister," a voice that conjured a grimace from me in response, "how about we refrain from damaging my children. For me?"

My seedy excuse for a brother watched me, his eyes full of that warped satisfaction. He was leaned up against the far wall of the throne room where I conducted the business of the realm. A low growl escaped my throat, brought forth by the sheer dislike for this man I felt such disdain for.

I gave his minion a rough shove, causing them to slide across the floor until they came to rest at Edward's feet. "Thank you, sister," he said, in a smug fashion. "To repay your kindness, I have brought for you an exchange." My jaw tightened as another of his sired brought a Terran woman into our midst. The woman was given direction, told to walk towards myself, and she stumbled towards me.

This woman was neither bound nor gagged, but I could see the terror in her eyes, that kept her from even attempting to escape. I looked passed her, to my brother, who smirked. "I have no desire for one of your 'gifts'."

Edward was mockingly aghast. "I went through much trouble, traveling to a Terran town to pick her up."

I could feel his presence scratching the edges of my mind. "Do not bother searching my thoughts. I will tell you what I am thinking – fuck off."

"That is unfortunate." By this time, the woman had made it to me and stood, looking back at my brother, waiting for further instruction. "Well, since I went through all of the trouble to get her, I imagine I had best not put that to waste. She will make a decent meal for my favorite subjects." At his words, the throne room was flooded with his offspring, all looking on hungrily. "They are all so ravenous, they might just tear her apart as they fight for a taste."

The woman gasped, looking to me to save her. I knew Edward was trying to push me into a corner. I would either have to protect the woman or watch her die in a most gruesome manner. "Please," she pleaded, "please help me." She had a sweet voice, tugging at the humanity within me.

"So be it, I will accept your gift."

Edward put a finger to his lips, tapping while he looked into the air above him. "But sister," he returned his gaze to me, "you did not seem appreciative of my offering and frankly, I think my friends will enjoy her more than yourself." They all took a step forward, making their presence even more smothering. "She is unclaimed and thus up for grabs."

I understood his intent. He was pushing for me to choose between breaking my fast on Terran blood and letting an innocent Terran die at the hands of brutality. Both options caused me pain and I always opted for the road with the least lasting hurt – a quick and painless death to the Terran my brother brought. I had always done it the same way, ending the game, and living on with a new Terran's blood on my hands. The woman backed away from the approaching Methuselahs, colliding with my stone body, squeaking and trying to duck away from me.

With the moment of contact, I had made my decision and as she tried to put some small distance between us, I stepped forward, my hand coming up from behind her, gripping her around the neck and holding her fast to my body. I adopted a possessive stance, trying to ignore the way she had begun to hyperventilate and claw at my fingers, unable to remove them from her neck.

One of Edward's fiends moved forward to challenge me for a chance at claiming the Terran meal. This elicited a growl that threatened harm and stopped him in his tracks. "She is mine," I declared. They all watched as I moved the woman's hair aside and shifted my grip from her neck to her chin, drawing it upward, exposing her throat. In a swift movement, I bit into her, drinking deep as she screamed.

When I released her, she fell to the floor at my feet, where she sobbed and held her neck. For me, I was experiencing the shift of my body, as her blood flowed through me. My limbs tingled as her blood spread in my veins, filling me completely. My vision changed, becoming clearer. It was like having lived years without color vision and suddenly shifting to being able to see in color. My brain hummed with the high I was experiencing.

"She is marked. If any dare touch her, I will personally hunt them down and kill them."

Edward was openly grinning. "A good show. We will all respect your mark." He snapped a finger and we were alone in the room. "I wondered if I would ever see your beautiful crimson eyes once more."

"You have gotten what you desired. You will now take your leave."

His smile did not falter. "Of course. Enjoy the gift." He exited, with a chuckle the lingered in my mind well after he was gone, leaving me with the Terran.

I looked down at the creature at my feet, whimpering softly, curled up into herself. I had wronged this Terran in a grave way. I had chosen a path I had never taken and now had to follow through, having put her through more than enough. I knelt, trying to diminish the level of intimidation I held, but knew that my display of physical prowess and ability to forcibly take away her bodily autonomy would forever make me a threat to her well-being.

"Hear my words, Terran," I spoke in a soft tone, needing to reach her. "I do not expect – in fact, I do not want you to forgive me for what harm I have done you. It shall never be something I can right within your lifetime, and that is something I will live with, as it was my choice to do as I did, but now I am offering my help." Her breathing slowed and her heart rate slowly fell. "You are by no means required to take my help, if you should feel more comfortable without it, and I would respect that."

Her face had been hidden in her hair, but she slowly upturned her head, revealing her warm brown eyes, reddened by her stress. I could see her swallow and imagined she had dry mouth. Having her attention, I continued. "This is merely a suggestion, but I would think it best to have your neck bandaged, or, should you accept it, I offer my blood as a healing agent. Do know," I warned, "should you chose to heal the mark, I could return you to your human life with no physical reminder of what has transpired." There was a light in her eyes, showing relief that I knew would wither with what I said next. "However, consuming my blood will carry a risk – should you die, you will become Methuselah. This effect is temporary. Also, for the remainder of your existence, you will dream of me, as you will be bound to me."

She was distraught, her breathing becoming strangled and she shifted away from me unsteadily, still trying to keep her hand clasped to her neck. "On the other hand, should you choose to keep the mark, you will forever be under my protection, but I will warn you that, should you choose to return to your Terran life, the stigma surrounding a person marked is extreme. Methuselah and Terran do not share the best of relations, I am afraid." She looked overwhelmed, to say the least. I surmised that she knew of the stigma of which I spoke and knew that the choice she was making would affect her for the rest of her life.

"You have time to make your choice. Until then, I will have one of the Terrans living in the palace come help you to clean your wound. Should you choose to keep the mark, it will heal better if it is clean." I moved at a Terran pace, not wanting to further startle her. I rose and made my way to the throne room entrance, where I hollered for one of the guards, thankfully sired by Emmett. "Bring me a Terran with medical knowledge," I demanded. She bowed and dashed off to do as she was bid.

I returned my gaze to the Terran woman, still where I had left her on the floor. "I will remain until the Terran has arrived. Then I shall not linger. However, should you need me for anything, and I emphasize on 'anything', ask for Rosalie." Her gaze shot up to meet my eyes from across the room, bewilderment written so heavily in the creases of her brow.

I turned from her gaze, knowing the fear that would soon overtake her visage. I was afraid of her fear. It chilled me to my core. Everything I strove for was to be trustworthy, despite the advantages I held over others. Her fear would be proof of my failure. I did not have the courage to face my failure at that time.

Kate returned with a Terran I did not recognize, but that mattered little to me. "Make sure she makes it to my chambers, fed and bandaged. If there is anything else she needs, whatever it may be, make sure she gets it, barring invasion of anyone's privacy. If she asks to be set free, you are to escort her to the nearest Terran town and give her provisions." Kate looked puzzled, but as I led her into the throne room, her breath caught at the sight of the mark.

"You fed."

"Word will travel soon enough. I have claimed her." I felt the stab of guilt as I used the common phrasing that clearly stated ownership. Any Methuselah would know her as the property of another. It sickened me that there was a system where the only way a Methuselah would not feed on a Terran was if the Terran was laid claim to. It disregarded the fact that a Terran has their own desires, which often does not include being the property of another.

"I am sorry to hear you broke your fast."

"Do not be sorry for me. I have only caused suffering," I chided, myself more than her, leaving the Terran in her care.

I stalked the halls, finally finding myself at my chambers, where I had guests in the sitting room. The first was a hulking man with an impishly handsome grin and vibrant scarlet eyes, my brother Emmett, one of the only tolerable faces I see on a semi regular basis. The second was a tiny woman, with pixie-like features and ever wild hair and garments. Her golden eyes glowed upon seeing me.

"Rose!"

"Alice?"

She bounded forward, embracing me with a fierce hug. After only a moment's hesitation, I gripped her tightly, returning her embrace. "I am so sorry," she cooed.

"Sister, it has been two centuries since we have seen you," I breathed, so utterly in shock about her return.

She tightened her grip in response. "I know and I deeply apologize. I had my reasons, but I know how much it hurt us all."

I pushed her away from my body, my hand coming up to her cheek. I smiled, feeling happiness bubbling up from the depths where I had left it. "I know you have your reasons, things I likely could not understand. I have seen the decrease in your children and that suggests that you were trying to hide yourself from Edward." Her jaw tightened and she nodded.

"I saw you feed," she explained. "I wanted so badly to stop it, but I couldn't. I am so sorry."

My jaw clenched unintentionally. "People need to stop feeling sorry for me."

Emmett strode forward, placing a hand on each of our backs. "Rose, we know how much this hurts you," he offered.

"Yes, it hurts me to know that the aspect of humanity I grasped onto is no longer, but I knew that this would be the outcome, and made an informed decision. She knew nothing. She asked me to be a savior and what she meant was for me to return her to her life untouched so that she could forget that anything had happened to her. I could not give her that. I knew that." Emotion stirred a thirst that I had not had to deal with in a long time. I was forced to pause, to reign in my monster. "I did not have time to inform her that her options were a quick death or our current timeline." I looked each of my siblings in the eye, checking to see that they followed. "I made the choice for her, robbing her of the choice that should only have been hers."

Emmett sighed. "It is better for her this way. She is alive, is she not?"

"No," Alice said, "I know what she means. I can see into the future and I can know what people want, as if we have had a conversation about it, but if I act on that knowledge, they have not consented to the outcome. It does not matter that it is the choice they would have made." Emmett grunted his understanding and I nodded.

Alice's eyes unfocused for a moment. "She comes this way," she announced. "We shall not further flood her with stimuli. Emmett and I shall take our leave for now."

"I am glad you are back," I offered. She nodded and grinned. Within a blink, they were gone.

I sank into a fur covered couch, trying to compensate for the crushing feeling in the absence of my newly returned sibling. I wished for my thoughts to settle, for a solution to be conjured from the depths of swirling guilt. I had never had to fix my wrongs in this way. Never had I so impacted the life of one creature, at least not in such a direct way. I could not help wonder if there was even anything I could do to ease her suffering.

Kate knocked on the outside door and announced their presence. I invited them in and found myself fixated on the fact that the Terran's hand clutched the jerkin Kate wore and her eyes were on the floor. "All went well," I inquired.

"As well as it could," Kate responded, her eyes following mine to the hand that was at her side. I saw a stirring of fear in Kate's eyes and made no effort to quell that fear, as it stung somehow, to see the Terran take to Kate. However, I also knew that I had no claim to being the Terran's savior and if she found comfort in Kate, I should allow her that comfort.

"Kate," I avoided addressing the Terran directly, fearing that she would not respond, "has she told you her name?"

Kate looked to the Terran's face and I watched their eyes meet. "My name is Isabella," the Terran spoke.

"Isabella," I mimicked, setting it to memory. "Would you like for Kate to stay with us, Isabella?" She blinked, surprised by the question, until she looked to her own hand and released the garment with a guilty look towards Kate and followed by a fearful glance in my direction. In a tone not audible to Terran ears, I addressed Kate, "if you are willing to be here for her, make it known to her."

Kate took my advice, although it is hard to say whether she felt she had a choice. "I am here if you need me," she told Isabella.

"No, um, thank you, but I could not ask that of you," she asserted, shaking her head furiously.

"It does not burden me," Kate pushed.

"Nor I," I added. "You need not consider me in any of your decisions. I will make whatever you need work," I vowed to her. Kate eyed me, unable to hide her concern.

"Would you stay?" Isabella asked, sheepishly.

"Of course."

"Right then," I stood, heading to the door that led to my bed chamber, "you may take my bed, Isabella. Kate shall be wherever you need her, and I shall remain out here." I opened the door for her and she hesitantly moved forward.

The proximity set off my thirst and I was forced to look away when she looked up at me, hiding the way my lip curled and eyes darkened. Kate followed her and I put a hand on her shoulder before she could pass me. "Thank you Kate," I told her through my own bloodlust. She nodded and I released her shoulder, letting her pass.

From in the chamber I heard Isabella gasp and ask, "That bed is meant for one person?"

Kate responded in just the manner I would have. "Not often is there just one person in it."

I closed the door, grinning as I smelled the flustered arousal that rose off of Isabella. I returned to my couch.

How does one begin to comprehend change? I have lived a life of fear, fear that I, a human, would catch the eye of one of my species' predators. We all live with the fear, some better than others. Myself, I had resigned to the idea that I would never have control over such a circumstance; that even if I avoided certain areas of town, avoided walking the streets at specific times, it could still not be helped. It was a matter of statistics. Three in four humans was victim to vampire harassment and one in four was fed upon against their will. I lived my life knowing my time outside of those statistics was bound to come to a close.

However, there is a difference between knowing the statistics and being in the moment. I had become complacent in a life where the fear was of what _could_ happen. I was not prepared for the sheer panic that came with being stripped from that life. To look into a vampire's red eyes and know that it was my turn. To find myself in a place occupied almost entirely by vampires. To feel their hungry eyes following me without a moment to breathe.

To top it off, I was being used in a game between two of them. It was a game for which I was not privy to the rules and so there was no room for rationale. Every action on my part was instinctual and grasping for any reprieve. It seemed pretty clear to me that the male, Edward, was the vampire most likely to get me killed. As I had seen it, the blonde female vampire was not on his side, and thus my best chance at survival.

I did not expect her methods. I should have. I am ignorant about the rules of vampire feeding, but I should have known that I was going to be bitten that night. I know I would have chosen the blonde as a recipient of my blood over Edward or his followers, but, with the sharp pain of her fangs penetrating my flesh, taking from me my sense of worth, degrading me to a meal, it did not matter that it was her over Edward. All I felt was pain and sorrow.

I remember the blonde's words. "She is mine." They rang through my head the whole time, a forced mantra on repeat. They ate at what dignity I still possessed.

I had not even realized that we were alone when she began addressing me directly, her voice very close to where I lay on the ground, my warm blood coating my hand. She was offering help, after what she had done. Her words were remorseful and it made me question myself further. Was I supposed to forgive her? She seemed like a decent person and willing to do what she could for me, but did that really negate what had already been done? Where does one draw the line?

I struggled to follow her words. She was offering me options and I captured the words that made most sense. My options centered around her bite mark on my neck – bandaging or healing. As she further explained, she told me I could be rid of it, the mark that pained me and signified that I was her property. My mind surged. I wanted that, a release from the event. It would not serve as a physical reminder to anyone. And then she pulled the rug out from under me.

Dream of her? Would my dreams replay my experience? Would my dreams cast her in the perfect light, have us share intimacies I hold sacred? Was that worth being unmarked? Which is worse – external or internal turmoil? I had not realized how much panic gripped me until she told me I had time to choose.

She moved away from me, summoning another. The reprieve of her absence did not last long. She told me she was bringing another human to help me. And then she dropped the biggest news yet – the woman who had claimed me, she was Rosalie, the Blood Queen. She was the leader of the Western world. The weight of the knowledge set my heart racing once more. How could I have confused the Blood Queen for someone who would give me aid?

My relief at the addition of new faces and Rosalie's exit was short lived. The human who was brought to assist me had no light in his eyes. He was a thrall to the vampire palace, his mind totally enslaved. I wondered if he felt anything or if he was just numb inside. He tenderly cleaned the bite and as he worked, my eyes fell on the vampire present.

She introduced herself as Kate, daughter of Emmett, and I was beginning to piece together that the person who had captured me was Edward, the Demon Prince. She did not crowd, trusting the thrall to do his work. "If I asked you to take me away from here, you would?" I asked.

There was no shift in her expression, nothing that told me she was listening, but then she said, "Rosalie has commanded that I will."

I had heard the command given, but did not understand. "Why would she command that?"

"She feels responsible for you," came Kate's response, accompanied by a shrug.

"I just do not understand how the Blood Queen could feel responsible for me," I admitted. I hissed when antiseptic was administered to the bite.

A soft chuckled was the only indication that Kate felt anything about my words. "Terrans have a warped view of her. That title is one given to her by Methuselah, for her ending her own legacy."

It was true – I had no true idea of where she had gotten the title and most speculation made her out to be a monster for humanity, but I had certainly not expected the true origin. "Why did she do it," I pried, using conversation to ignore the heavy beat of my heart and the sting in my neck.

"I do not see how it is any of your concern," Kate intoned and I winced.

I was not ready to give up conversation, as it was the most concretely human thing available to me, I pushed forward. "Do you fear her?"

Kate's expression flickered with anguish, but otherwise remained set in neutrality. "Every Methuselah fears each of the Originals. We would be fools not to."

"Then, you would not lay a finger on me?" I wanted to know more about the way 'claiming' worked. To what extent was I safe?

"You have no need to fear me," she asserted. She approached, shooing the thrall out of her way. Her fingers reached out slowly, as if hesitant to make contact with me. They were cool against my reddened skin. "Do you see how the bite is made up of four punctures," she indicated, her finger circling an adjacent set. I strained my eyes to see the mark, visible once my blood had been wiped away, confirming that the punctures paired together. "This style of bite is only made by an Original. No one will dare harm you."

Her fingers retreated and I felt at a loss. I had appreciated her gentle touch. "Are you someone I can trust?"

This time she did not hold back her snorted chuckle. "You can trust whoever you like, as that is your own prerogative, but no one is trustworthy. The only thing you can trust is the code and even that is only strictly followed within Rosalie's company."

I felt my throat tighten. "You are not very comforting," I informed her.

"Would you prefer I lie?" I sensed that she was feeling playful, but I wondered if my sense was misplaced.

"If that is what it takes," I replied honestly. The thrall began to bandage the bite and I was slightly surprised Kate did not stop him.

"But now there is conscious recognition that I will be lying at times." Her brows drew together. Perhaps she was distracted, I considered.

I rose from the floor after the bandage was properly placed. My fingers still tingled with the adrenaline pumped into my system, my legs struggling with my weight. Kate noticed my uneasiness and offered support. With a shake of my head, I denied her advance. "Do vampires not ever lie for other people's benefit," I ventured.

"We are self-centered by nature," she answered.

I chuckled sardonically. "Were you not born human? When do you lose the ability to think of others?"

A muscle jumped in Kate's jaw and I flinched. "We a reborn as Methuselah – ingrained with an understanding of life as nothing more than the struggle for survival while nothing in the world is in our favor." I heard hurt in her words. It pointed me to my error. Perhaps vampires like her longed for connection they did not think they would ever receive. She took my silence as an end to the conversation. "I am to bring you to the kitchen, for food." She dismissed the thrall.

I let her lead me through the halls of the palace to the kitchen, which was mostly barren. "You do not have much use for food, do you?"

"The Terrans eat, but I am sure most of the food is bland." She wrinkled her nose. "It certainly does not smell appealing."

I could not tell if she was making an attempt at humor, but I laughed, my nerves needing it. "I will spare you the details of its flavor."

Kate nodded, a hint of a smile coloring her expression. "I imagine that Rosalie will look to bring in better cuisine for you, come morning," she assured. Mention of my host brought my progress towards controlling my fear to a screeching halt. Kate took notice, pausing her gathering of food to look at me. "When I said no one was trustworthy, Rosalie might be the one exception."

"I will try to keep that in mind," I said, dismissing the thought that the only person I could trust was the one who had violated what trust I had afforded her.

"Here," Kate offered me some bread and cheese. I ate greedily, without thought of my appearance. I reasoned that I could not guarantee my next meal. "Rosalie offered her chambers for you to sleep."

I nearly choked on a crust of bread. "Is there anywhere else I can sleep?"

"You can sleep anywhere you like."

"No, I mean, other bedchambers-," I was clued into the fact that she was joking by the slight smirk she wore. If deflated my panic.

"There are other chambers that you could use, but you will be safest where Rosalie can personally look after your health."

I looked away. "So, that is what you would suggest?" She nodded her affirmation. I steeled myself before nodding my agreement. She offered an encouraging smile before leading me through the halls once more. I was surprised by the absence of people. "There are not many people here," I voiced my observation.

"Methuselah and some Terrans come during the day to voice concerns and Rosalie takes council with Emmett at times, but otherwise, Rosalie prefers solitude. The only reason there are guards, like myself, is by Emmett's insistence." She cleared her throat. "We are here," she said in warning before knocking on a door at the end of the hall we had traveled down.

Instinctively, I reached out for her, needing some level of contact, something to ground my mind as my heart rate tried to climb once more. I moved with Kate, keeping our proximity. Conversation picked up between vampires and I was struck by how Rosalie avoided addressing me. When my name was in question, I leapt at the chance to assert my presence. With an encouraging look from Kate, I found my voice, saying my first words to my host. "My name is Isabella," I declared, wondering if my voice held the conviction I could not bring myself to feel.


End file.
